So, I figured after this year's heartache, one should never put too much emotions into the people, it's hard to achieve that goal, but one figures one has become soft and weak. People lie and betray, then why the drama in the first place, then pretend everything's well afterwards. put too much into it, really is asking for trouble. As the masters would say, it's all an empty shell in the end, easy said then done. one would love to be challenged, head to a place where there is no tv, no computer, no folks with temptation, no folks with attraction, distraction, irritation and annoyance, just live, cook, eat, write, read and sleep, and yes even some chores of choice. One would do well as a hermit eh? sadly, that is not one challenge that can easily even start with, too much burden that one can't let go yet. perhaps the first lesson of letting go has not been completed in its entirety.
truly, some people cry wolves and bullshits when things dont' go according to their own plan, they cry about it, vent about it to you, but when things go well, you'r not even in the universe. another lesson learned: One should not care too much from the start, it may sound harsh, but hey, reality bites.
empty, empty i tell you is the key to it all